May 2013
3 tags
May 20th
3 tags
“The service industry and I have had a rocky relationship. Because of my unique...”
– Chelsea Handler
May 16th
30 notes
2 tags
May 16th
5 tags
“You know what the great thing about rejection is? [It’s] that it...”
– Chelsea Handler, Chelsea Lately Hillary from Lady Antebellum didn’t make it past the first round of American Idol twice. They’ve gone on to play on the show.
May 16th
29 notes
6 tags
“Have you taken Adderall? … It’s really good if you like to like party...”
– Natasha Leggero, Chelsea Lately
May 16th
11 notes
May 16th
251,072 notes
May 15th
85 notes
May 15th
9,604 notes
May 15th
86,170 notes
chiblogger: chiblogger: GUYS HELP SOMETHING HAS BEEN TAPPING ON MY WINDOW FOR LIKE 5 MINUTES I’M SCARED TO GO LOOK oh my gOD
May 15th
75,807 notes
theblackship: life becomes a little bit more beautiful once you realize that there is two people sharing a bowl of salsa in the logo i was more excited when i found the arrow in fed ex no, how about when I realized that the arrow in amazon was pointing from a to z (saying that they sell anything from a to z) i like the google logo because it is colorful
May 15th
103,379 notes
*Pollen accidentally enters body*
Immune system: What the hell is that?
Pollen: Oh hey. Sorry. We got a bit lost. The wind kinda bl-
Immune system: OH GOD WE'RE UNDER ATTACK
Pollen: What?!? No! We just got lo-
Immune system: OPEN THE FLOODGATES
Pollen: The what?
Mucus membranes: Sir. All the floodgates?
Immune system: ALL OF THEM.
Pollen: Wait. Wait. You don't... Oh shi-
[Dramatic music]
Me: *Sneezes*
May 15th
54,819 notes
May 15th
63 notes
May 15th
6,386 notes
May 15th
47,643 notes
May 15th
307,451 notes
May 14th
110,829 notes
2 tags
“The moment that you’re in resus, and you’re really sick, and all you...”
– 24 Hours In A&E
May 14th
May 14th
369,847 notes
May 14th
101,526 notes
May 14th
42 notes
May 13th
15,307 notes
4 tags
May 13th
May 13th
May 13th
sassygayherondales: stylishirish: horain: stylishirish: this guy i know throws this wild crazy party at the end of every school year and he invites literally everyone in our grade and this year i’m gonna call the cops ahead of time to shut it down because i once let him borrow a pencil and he never gave it back  that’s a lot of anger over just 1 pencil. it was a mechanical pencil  ...
May 13th
192,664 notes
May 13th
May 13th
196,468 notes
drarna: emojis are so cute and i love that brown haired girl in pink dress emoji and brown haired boy in blue shirt emoji are together but even brown haired boy in blue shirt emoji has his secrets…
May 13th
33,541 notes
egg-rolls: i just remembered something i did when i was 13 now my day is ruined
May 13th
44,623 notes
bombliate: official-honeybooboo: bombliate: dave-vriska: bombliate: [JUDGE VOICE] did u do the thing [DEFENDANT VOICE] no [JUDGE VOICE] i don’t believe u [WITNESS VOICE] he did the thing [JUDGE VOICE] ooooooh i knew it
May 13th
51,599 notes
May 13th
7 notes
snapchatting: *points at ur attention* give me that
May 13th
23,327 notes
hipsterinatardis: Naps are tricky because you either wake up refreshed and relaxed or you have a headache, dry throat, and are unaware of what year you’re in.
May 13th
124,299 notes
buttsandbooks: time to do french homework!!!!1!
May 13th
52 notes
partybarackisinthehousetonight: pro tip: fill the piñata with absolutely nothing to prepare your kids for the letdowns of adulthood
May 12th
74,088 notes
May 12th
10 notes
1 tag
“I crushed up some sleeping pills, put ‘em in your juice.”
– Kate being romantic, Lost.
May 12th
1 note
nahlou: there are hannah montana lyrics for whatever life throws at you
May 12th
37,894 notes
1 tag
May 12th
2,946 notes
May 12th
81,748 notes
May 12th
2 notes
May 11th
53,337 notes
May 11th
2,388 notes
May 11th
225 notes
May 11th
May 11th
3 tags
May 11th
May 11th
2,781 notes
May 9th
269,592 notes